we_bring_hell: (Four for fidelity)
[personal profile] we_bring_hell
Observe Harrowhark Nonagesimus, flopped full-length on a sofa in Milliways, moaning into a cushion. She looks like a heap of coal-filthy laundry, like a bad black snake trying to wriggle into a crack in the fabric of reality and never return.

(When I release you from my service, Nav, you will know about it.)

She fucked up.

(It's just me. Go back to sleep.)

She fucked up so bad.

(Never work with children, Griddle. Their prefrontal cortexes aren't developed.)

She wants to die. For one golden moment she had done something right. Something worthy of what she's been given.

(Death first to vultures and scavengers.

It was good. You were good.
)

She is a dullard. An imbecile. A fool. She had screamed herself hoarse upbraiding herself, then left Griddle with that viper Septimus to go do--what? Nothing useful. Nothing to bring back the flower of the Fourth. All she'd done is give Dulcinea Septimus more time to thieve the loyalty of her cavalier.

She wants to die, but she isn't allowed to die, not until she has redeemed the deaths of two hundred (and two!) children. Not until she's sold her poor mortgaged soul to the Emperor and the Corse of the Locked Tomb and renewed the Ninth. All of their hopes ride on her, and she is sinking under them, and the golden eyes of Gideon Nav are all their eyes; the eyes that can't believe that God and chance have entrusted their fate and their fidelity to this failure.

(Harrow, I hate you. I never stopped hating you. I will always hate you and you will always hate me.)

Date: 2020-09-02 04:41 am (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (Default)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
He steps through what he has by now come to think of as a strange sort of portal talisman, passing from Cold Pond Cave into the inn with ease.

Lan Wangji will never, never be able to take this for granted. Will never cease being grateful for the impossibility of this place, of Wei Ying's presence, of his own welcome found.

He glances around the room, but does not see Wei Ying, at least not yet. (He is, perhaps, a little earlier than he should be, he realizes. He will have to be careful; will need to practice patience, no matter how difficult it may be these days.) He does, however, see a familiar figure... and cannot fail to notice the evident signs of distress.

A frown creases his forehead, just above the ribbon, and he crosses the room.

"Reverend Daughter?"

Date: 2020-09-02 05:40 am (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (playing guqin)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos

"You are unwell."

He is not certain of what has happened, or why she is like this in a public room in an inn, but he is positive that it can be nothing good.

He takes a careful look, as well as he can. She does not seem to have spit blood, and she has no visible wounds, but the way she is curling around herself he half fears she is on the verge of going into qi deviation.

It is that thought which decides him. There is a low table in front of the couch, and he takes a seat at it, across from her, then sweeps his guqin out into place before him.

As he strikes the first notes of Cleansing, trying to soothe and calm, he looks up at her, to watch for any effect.

Date: 2020-09-02 05:57 am (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (playing guqin)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
"Mn."

He moves seamlessly from the end of Cleansing into Tranquility and continues to play, focusing with spiritual energy through the music, offering whatever peace he can.

Date: 2020-09-02 01:04 pm (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (playing guqin)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
He is seemingly absorbed in the music, in the act of playing, but he glances up again as she stirs.

He says nothing, not yet. His fingers continue to move across the strings with ease, sending forth sound.

It is not overly loud, although he could fill the room if he so chose. Instead, he has kept it low and somehow almost private, constrained to the immediate area, rather than a performance for an audience other than this.

Date: 2020-09-02 03:24 pm (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (playing guqin)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
Still continuing the current variation on Tranquility, he says, simply,

"Meditation may help. If you can."

Date: 2020-09-02 04:09 pm (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (playing guqin)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
As her fingers move through the rosary, he shifts the tempo of the music slightly, just enough so that it forms an accompaniment in time with her steady recitation.

(The disciples of the Lan are skilled in musical cultivation.

The Twin Jades are without peer.)

He continues to play, allowing one melody to flow into the next without interruption, intending to do so as long as her meditation continues, until she is steadier.

Date: 2020-09-02 04:27 pm (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (Default)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
"I will wait."

Said without hesitation. He lifts his hands from the guqin, bringing the music to a close, then places one hand on the strings to still them.

Date: 2020-09-02 04:57 pm (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (Default)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
He has remained seated, with the guqin on the table in front of him.

"Mn."

It makes as much sense as any temple's requirements or sect's rules - and considering that there are 3,000 rules carved on the Wall of Discipline at Gusu Lan, he is certainly in no position to judge.

"Do you wish me to resume playing?"

Date: 2020-09-02 05:05 pm (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (playing guqin)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
"That is its purpose."

Lightly, softly, he begins to play a more relaxed version of the previous song, one that can flow beneath words rather than over them, if she wishes to speak further.

Date: 2020-09-02 05:54 pm (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (twin jades - watching)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
"It is a guqin," he tells her.

"Since I was very young."

He's not actually certain when he first began, but he knows it was earlier than the usual disciples' training - for him and Xichen both.

"Maybe fifteen years. Or more."

Date: 2020-09-02 06:03 pm (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (hanguang-jun)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
He looks a little uncomfortable at that.

Lying is forbidden in the Cloud Recesses.

"It can."

The same gentle melody keeps rippling forth as he talks.

"Not this. But there are techniques."

Date: 2020-09-02 06:24 pm (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (hanguang-jun)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
"It is fine," he reassures her.

"Reverend Daughter. You are troubled."

Date: 2020-09-02 06:30 pm (UTC)
lightamidchaos: (hanguang-jun)
From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos
It is not hard to read that tone of voice, especially given how private he himself is.

"Mn."

After a moment, during which the melodic line rises and falls again in the flow from one variation to another, he adds,

"I will play for as long as you like."

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 06:40 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 07:02 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 07:21 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 07:41 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 07:52 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 08:43 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 09:47 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 10:12 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 10:34 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 10:54 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 11:01 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 11:15 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 11:23 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-02 11:51 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] lightamidchaos - Date: 2020-09-03 12:02 am (UTC) - Expand

Profile

we_bring_hell: (Default)
Harrowhark the Ninth

November 2020

S M T W T F S
12 34567
8910 11121314
15161718192021
2223 2425262728
2930     

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jun. 11th, 2025 01:38 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios